Tuesday, November 1, 2016

Taking a step back

Image result for taking a breatherIn a world that appears to constantly rushing forward, where 15 min of fame has turned into 15 min to get your point across and have it appear as fact whether it is or not.  A place where technology moves at the speed of light and we more often than not find ourselves wondering why we agreed to that one more thing I think we need a Take A Breath Day.

Not an add on to a scheduled time, or a few hours, but a whole day where we can sit back and not be caught in the frenzy.  

As a woman who works outside the home and has two rapidly growing boys I find myself more often than I like just wondering where the day, week, month, year went.   I am looking at the things I just accomplished and the things still to be scheduled and done.  I am claiming a day soon where I just focus on the here and now.

It is so easy to think 1) that everything is new 2) that we have to partake in it all 3) that we will always have the time to do all of it.

Let's look at the political news cycle -  no this is not our first, nor even just the US election history's, candidate that has spoken of the things we all shudder to hear uttered.   She is not novel in having ties and history with people who we wish would not be near our elected officials.  We have survived worse and we have thrived with better.  We will do that also this time around.  What is sad is that we forget this and allow this much power and attention to be given to people who frankly should be given none.   The attention we lavish on them is not even new it is just is happening faster.  If we took a moment to look at the candidates, to really research them and to apply a measured review we would vote for what is best not what answers our emotions. Take a breath - take a step back - then vote. 

If you look at our children people are freaking out over screen time, the way they interact, the fact that they have access to infinite information yet choose to watch YouTube videos.   If we took a step back this would not seem remotely new to any of us.   These are different technologies but exactly the same behaviors.  We had it with TV, our parents had it with phones, and so on.  Each generation changes to the evolution of the media available to them.  This does  not make any of it right or wrong it just makes it a point to think about. Take a breath - take a step back - you survived Bugs Bunny and learned opera from it, they will learn from this and be amazing for the skills they learn. 

The idea of taking a step back is so that you can propel yourself forward.  Taking a moment to look at what you read and find out if it is real is easier today than ever before.  Sending a message is easier but should not be done with less thought that it has in years past - the technology does not make bad behavior acceptable. Take a breath - read the message before you send it out loud in your voice in your head - then send it if it still accomplishes what you hope it would. 

The things that give us pleasure should not be rushed through.  Being present with your children instead of worrying, examining, planning is a gift for them and for us.  Enjoying sex, food, music, faith, exercise, reading, creativity or whatever it is that is done for pleasure, happiness should be done not as another thing to check off but given time, attention.  Take a deep breath - have more of those things - go on you can come back to this blog. 

I once was hurt tremendously by someone who "fit me" in, who thought he complimented me by saying he thought I was so accommodating by making the time we spent together convenient.  He hurt me because I realized he would never step back to make me a priority, to step back like you would with a painting and see it from a different perspective and that perspective was how the picture of me should have been seen whole to ensure that I was a priority.  I was not the tv ad you skip by, I should have been the masterpiece that he wanted to contribute to.  It took me years to learn that and I am thankful for the experience.  Took a deep breath - went to therapy - think of him fondly for helping me realize this. 

So take a step back, close your eyes, deep breathe and take some time to appreciate the now while it is still the present instead of admiring it as part of a history you just captured on social media while you were hurling to the next thing.

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